Line Of The Day

"Walking around the apartment in boxers should be mandatory!"

You really do feel free.

Is It Offensive?

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I walk into a supermarket the other day to buy groceries. When I get to the register the cashier says "would you like to donate to the Children's Cancer Fund?" I said no and that just started off a storm. The cashier gave me the mean mug as she handed me back my change and I could feel the eyes of the people behind me burning a hole through me.

Now I ask you should I be offended that they were so mean to me? Yeah that's right they were mean to me. Oh you thought I was going to say I was being offensive when I said no? Yeah that would be too easy.

FML Of The Day

"Today, my girlfriend confessed that she had drunkenly slept with another guy last night. Since she seemed genuinely upset, and had confessed right away, I decided to forgive her the slip-up. She then angrily broke up with me, because "if I really loved her, I would've been more angry." FML

Haha, you just can't win with women. They are like a different species.

Line Of The Day

"Get a smartphone, just do it. Girls like a man with a smartphone because she won't pose for you with a flip phone."

I did not know I majored in photography.

Is this boy band 4Count for real?

I saw this video on YouTube the other day and could not wrap my mind around it. They are called 4Count and they have a song called Snapbacks, which, what do you know has a music video. They are singing, they have dancers in the video and there is a hot woman in it as well... but it just does not add up.

I showed this to my roommate and he said and I quote, "I just lost five minutes of my life that I will never, ever get back. Thanks!" So you decide if this video is for real or they just made a parody and the joke is on them.

FML Of The Day

"Today, I found out that Yale had actually accepted me seventeen years ago. My mother apparently burned my acceptance package and letters because she didn't want me to upstage her UChicago degree." FML

Wow!!! I don't think she knows what it means to be a mother.

Line Of The Day

"I have seen a lot of women with short/pixie hair these days and I wonder whom we should credit with this, Halle Berry or Rihanna?"

This is a very good question.