Say Hello To The Newest Member Of Black And Brown

Welcome the new member of the Black and Brown blog, Aly or as we like to call her at the moment the whitr filling between black and brown. Yeah it's corny but it was funny at the time. Hopefully she will contribute each week and give her female perspective on things.

The difference between the way men and women talk about sex.

There’s a big difference between the way men and women talk about sex. I don’t really know why men think they are so vulgar with what they talk about. They discuss their first strip club experiences and talk about the way their women look- mainly bragging or exaggerating to one- up their friends. Women talk about sex for a whole other reason- to talk about sexual issues with their men or discuss their opinions in hopes that they are normal.

I work at a strip club where believe it or not, talking about sex with other girls is actually considered a little taboo. Most girls are afraid that if they talk about their sexuality too much, they might be considered sluts among the other girls because they will seem that they have it too often or they may even be sleeping with customers, which is frowned upon in my club.

Despite the possible tabooness of talking about sex in a strip club, here are some of the dancers I have overheard/ been a part of in the locker room:

Dancer 1 who is a mix of European and Puerto Rican: There’s nothing like a big black dick. I just can’t do the white men. I mean I’ve seen a pink dick before, and I couldn’t suck him. It was just too ugly. I like that big juicy cock when it’s dark, almost purple. It feels so good.

Dancer 2 who is little and white: My boyfriend needs to grow some balls and just do me in the ass.

Dancer 3- I’ve actually heard this from multiple dancers: There’s nothing like a little bit of ecstasy, some alcohol and sex. It just feels so nice.

Dancer 4 who is African American: I used to be a dominatrix. There was one time a rabbi came in to look at all the girls. I didn’t think he would pick me. I thought he’d pick a little white girl or something. Anyway, he picks me and wants me to spank him, whip him, choke him and call him a dirty rabbi that needs to be crucified.

If you think that it’s just strippers who talk this way, guess again. I have had conversations with my mother about when she and my father were still together. I don’t want to give too many details away, but apparently, my dad was a little odd.

I’ve had conversations about others’ sex lives with their current significant other or exes. An older, very beautiful French lady I had recently been living with used to have a husband who would force her to swing with him and hurt her during sex.

Here are the conversations I’ve had with men about sex:

Friend 1 who loves talking about sex with anyone else who doesn’t mind: I love doing my girlfriend from behind. She makes this squealing noise. It just makes me super excited.

Friend 2: This new girl I started seeing is super hot. She’s got this great ass. I just love it.

My dad about his fiancé: No honey, sex is for marriage. And then after marriage- sex is sacred and only for the bedroom.

My step mom- Um… well, it happens sometimes at least. My ex- husband was much better.

If you think it’s just because these guys are my friends, here are what my customers say to me. I’ll only choose the more interesting ones.

Customer 1: I go to the nude beaches a lot which is where all the swingers hang out. One time, a guy begged me to do his wife while he watched and she was all for it. It was pretty amazing.

Customer 2: Asked me what kind of sex I like. I answer rough. He doesn’t believe me/ can’t add anything to the conversation so it ends.

Customer 3: Do you like it in the ass? I answer oh yes. He says me too. End of talk about anal.

I talk really nasty to get a VIP dance. Sorry readers, use your imagination. Customer oh yeah? That’s some good images in my head there. 8 out of 10 times it works.

Basically, women are more likely to do the dirty details about their sex lives than men. I don’t really know why men have such a difficult time discussing details perhaps it is because they don’t think about sex in detail. Women do, just as they think about everything else.

We Have A Question For All The Ladies Out There

It hgas been brought to our attention that many women are not too fond of the golddigger moniker bestowed upon them. Women say they don't date a man because he has money, fame or can take her places but that he has confidence and is just an amazing person. Well here are some examples that put this to the test.

Exhibit A- Bradley Cooper

Bradley Cooper is up for an Oscar this weekend and has been in some pretty decent movies in the past couple of years from the "Hangovers", "Limitless" and now "Silver Linings Playbook." He has money now, speaks french and seems like a cool guy to hang with. Women fawn over him and the examples just listed show why. He was in movies prior to those and the only things tha changed about him was not his looks, not his Georgetown education or the languages he speaks but the size of his wallet.

Exhibit B- Jesse Heiman

If you don't know who Jesse Heiman is let's refresh your memory,

This guy who has been in numerous movies and television shows but never had a major role until the commercial above where he locks lips with Bar Refaeli. We don't judge here at BNB but I'm certain 9 times out of 10 no women would pick this guy to kiss or let alone do anything else with. But after this commercial he says his agent can't stop fielding calls from executives who want to put him in movies or other commercials. Also he says women have been askng him out on dates and he has had to TURN SOME OF THEM DOWN because he can't keep up with the demand.


Like 50 Cent said, "A man becomes as attractive as an attractive woman when he becomes successful and is publicly noted.” If you disagree let us know because this is just mind boggling.

Men And Their Pick-up Attempts

In my lifetime I have seen some questionable pick-up attempts by guys that come in all shapes and sizes. Some might make you scratch your head, some make you laugh and others make you cry because you notice there is no hope for humanity.

Whistling:
When has this ever worked? Does she automatically hear this and think maybe he wants me to get the paper now. She is not Lassie but after she has turned you down you probably are going to call her a bitch.

Shouting Her Down:
Ay Bay Bay or Yo ma! You are not a rapper and she is not a video girl, stripper or prostitute. But then again you do let your chain hang low and smoke that purple.

Grab Her When The First Two Don't Work:
You and I know that this an easy way for a man to get his ass whipped by the cops and have her press charges. If talking to her would not walk work what makes you think impeding her progress will work any better? It won't but some only learn the hard way.

Why Men Do Stupid Things Around Women

We have all seen it where a guy will try and sing in public when he should not. Pick a fight with someone who is probabaly a heavyweight boxer and will definitely kick his ass. Or how about try and hit on a stripper who is their to take his money and give him a lapdance but not take him home. These are just some of the examples men make when they are around women.

Men are sometimes not so smart when it comes to women. They began to fumble their words or began to do things they would never ever do. Even one of the smartest men in the world Stephen Hawking says he is baffled by women. If he is baffled then what chance does that leave for the guys who just learned how to tie their shoes the other day.

Men try to hook up with women that are truly out of their league. Don't get me wrong if you want to date a supermodel or the girl of your dreams by all means go for it. But don't get all depressed when she turns you down for that Brad Pitt or George Clooney look-alike. Sometimes you don't measure up and just remember that the next time you try.

And the main reason men do stupid things around women is because many men think with their penis first and penis second before their brain starts factoring into the equation. Have you ever been to a party where the amount of men outnumbers the women like 10-1? It is like someone left meat in front of a tiger that has not eaten in weeks and you know it is feeding time. That one could not be the best looking female around but after some drinks it won't even matter.

It Takes One Of The Smartest Men In The World, Wait, No It Doesn't

http://news.yahoo.com/women-mystery-british-physicist-hawking-135814776.html

Stephen Hawking for those of you who may not know is one of if not the smartest men in the world. He could say we need more cow bell to close up the hole in the ozone layer and people would probably believe him. He is a theoretical physicist, which I had to look up before writing this. So in a recent interview he was asked what is the biggest mystery in the world? His answer was women. I don't think we needed him to bring that to light but now that he has said it, it just makes more sense. I have been on this planet about two decades and I could have told people that but what do I know. I just blog about stuff and hope someone gets a chuckle out of it.

You Just Blew Your Chance

As I said in an earlier post the transit system in this city is something else. And yes I know another train story but what can I say the, "MTA Is Going My Way."

A female get's on the train a stop after I do and she sits down in a pretty empty train car. Some stops later a guy get's on and he sits all the way at the other end of the car but not before he walked passed her. So as time wore on he would stand up and look down at her. Pretend to read a map or just get up and stretch. Then he decided to make his bold move.

He began to move closer and closer to her. He was still about 30 feet away but the space in between was shrinking. Where was I you ask to witness this spectacle? I was right in between both of them watching this unfold. All I kept thinking is he better make that move because her stop might be approaching soon. Don't worry about him because he would have went to North Korea if she was going there.

And of course her stop comes and she walks out of his underground world. He didn't have to say anything for the look on his face said it all. Moral of the story is don't be the creep in the corner just looking like a weirdo, be the creep in the corner that was looking like a weirdo that made a move. In the end she might not go out with you but she might have some respect for you.

Can You Stop Staring?

There is never a dull moment on the New York City subway system. Even the most ordinary things can catch people especially tourists off-guard. But sometimes you have to keep your eyes open to find the hidden gems.

I was on the train the other day and just minding my own business when this man and woman get on. Now I have no idea if they were a couple but for the sake of this story they are now. As they are having a conversation a woman gets on a couple of stops later and let's just say the guy gives her a once over. The glance was quick but  enough to picture her naked and what position he would like to put her in. It's like looking into the sun you have to look at it quick or end up going blind.

Then after checking her out he looked straight ahead and pretended to go to sleep standing up.  After that he sat down with his womnan and everything was forgotten. I could tell this was not this man's first rodeo.